BAM 2024

guest reply :

After reading the thread about how to buy stuff so our wives don't complain, I hereby appoint myself President for life of a Bass fishing club called "Bassers Are Men, or BAM.

With all due respect to the Lady bassers on the forum, this is a mens only club.

The motto of the club is that quality fishing tackle is a necessity not a luxury.

rule #1

A GLoomis rod or similar high end fishing rod is more important than new kitchen curtains. A BAM member in good standing will proudly purchase the rod using whatever resources are available and generously offer to tie-dye an old sheet (wife can choose colors) to use as curtains.

I am in the process of writing additional rules and welcome any suggestions.

RLinNH reply :

ARule #2- Do not let my wife see this thread. Damnit, she read it. :'(

Deuceu72 reply :

Rule # 2...........Winter is the time for chores. Spring through fall I will be busy! ;D ;D ;D

fishingfrenzy reply :

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Rule # 2...........Winter is the time for chores. Spring through fall I will be busy!

That doesnt apply to me, deer season is in the winter...guess I get the whole year off then ;D

RoLo reply :

My wife is my fishing partner and my best shield against feelings of guilt.

I can buy anything my heart desires, as long as she gets one too

When I went deer hunting with the bow-and-arrow, my wife would be the only woman

in the diner at 4AM, wearing a camouflage outfit.

I know, I know...I'm no fun at all

Roger

grove83 reply :

Rolo-you, my friend, are the EXCEPTION!!!! Your like that guy all the others are envious of. My wife thinks that hunting/fishing are "mean" to the animals....but I still get permission to go....a lot. I'm begining to think that my wife doesn't like me :-[ HAHAHA J/K

Rule #3 (since there are two rule twos) Forgiveness is often easier to obtain the permission!!!! ;D

basser89 reply :

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Rule # 2...........Winter is the time for chores. Spring through fall I will be busy! ;D ;D ;D

And here I thought winter was the time to hit warm water discharge areas!!! It's never too cold unless the water freezes solid on the guides! ;D

.ghoti. reply :

Rule #4. You can never have too many baits.

Captain reply :

RULE #5 - Choices

Sometimes it's better "to have" (new reel) than it is "to hold" (ill woman).

Of course you could "have" that new Curado and "hold" that pillow while you're sleeping on the couch.

cravenfish reply :

Final Rule should read: if you are afraid of what your wife will say about fishing, get new wife!!!!

Tom Bass reply :

I'll join!

I also say that there should be no rules. I say we make up the rules as we see fit so that no one can use our rules against us!

Minuteman reply :

Rule 4: Don't talk about Fight Club. Oopps, that is the other club I'm in.

Nick_Barr reply :

Rule: Destroy all reciepts, alter all bank statements, get a secret bank account in the Caman Islands for your stash of fishing money.

paparock reply :

I'm with Rolo. My wife is fine as long as she gets to go fish too. How many wives ask their husbands if they are sure they don't need anything else before leaving the tackle store? ;D

Cephkiller reply :

If your wife goes fishing with you, what do you do to get away from your wife?

;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

basser89 reply :

Since Avid appointed himself President, I'd like to nominate myself as Treasurer! ;D

Show me da money! I'll take on the Bait Monkey then!

sodaksker reply :

Rule # 6

This thread is for married or previously married folk. No offense to you single guys living the carefree life of fishing whenever you want. I got married so I didn't have to chase it anymore, problem was, I didn't realize I would now have to fight for it. It's always cheaper to rent than to own.

guest reply :

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Rule # 6
This thread is for married or previously married folk. No offense to you single guys living the carefree life of fishing whenever you want. .

Not necessarily so. Alot of guys out there have long term girlfriends and go through much the same stuff as the married guys.

guest reply :

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If your wife goes fishing with you, what do you do to get away from your wife?
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Excellent attitude, and a role model we all should try to emulate.

I hereby appoint Cephkiller as Vice President for life.

guest reply :

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Since Avid appointed himself President, I'd like to nominate myself as Treasurer! ;D
Show me da money! I'll take on the Bait Monkey then!

You show promise young fella, but your not quite on board yet. You see, we BAMMERS understand that fishing tackle is the priority.

Ya got a cute kid there, but does she really need three meals EVERY day?

guest reply :

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Rule #4. You can never have too many baits.

Excellent rule and so adopted.

I hereby appoint you masterbait.........errrrr.......I mean Baitmaster for life!

Ben reply :

Ya'll are not training your wives properly. Mine never says anything about any of the boats or motors I have, or how much I spend on them or tackle.

I did it like this. I retired from the Air Force about 9 years ago. After about 9 months of being together 24 hours a day, we both decided somebody had to get out and go to work before we started wanting to kill each other, so I did. The agreement was what ever money I made working would go to the house (her actually) and my AF retirement would be mine since I had already put almost 23 years in for that and had planned on staying retired. It took another few months and a few more battles for it to soak in she was not getting any of my retirement (plus having to make the bank stop sending my bank statement to the house)(everytime she saw a statement and it had a few $K in it she automatically came up with a need for it) but now it's great. After taxes and a couple of allotments are taken out it leaves me about $1,600 a month spending money. Most spending money I've had my whole life. The lions share of that goes into fishing. Well, I guess now days I can say the lions share of that goes into the boats and trucks gas tank. Before I went back to work, I had a $200 per month "allowance", so didn't do much on that.

guest reply :

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Ya'll are not training your wives properly. Mine never says anything about any of the boats or motors I have, or how much I spend on them or tackle.
I did it like this. I retired from the Air Force about 9 years ago. After about 9 months of being together 24 hours a day, we both decided somebody had to get out and go to work before we started wanting to kill each other, so I did. The agreement was what ever money I made working would go to the house (her actually) and my AF retirement would be mine since I had already put almost 23 years in for that and had planned on staying retired. It took another few months and a few more battles for it to soak in she was not getting any of my retirement (plus having to make the bank stop sending my bank statement to the house)(everytime she saw a statement and it had a few $K in it she automatically came up with a need for it) but now it's great. After taxes and a couple of allotments are taken out it leaves me about $1,600 a month spending money. Most spending money I've had my whole life. The lions share of that goes into fishing. Well, I guess now days I can say the lions share of that goes into the boats and trucks gas tank. Before I went back to work, I had a $200 per month "allowance", so didn't do much on that.

Spoken like a true BAMMER.

I appoint you BAM attitude adjuster

Captain Cali reply :

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Rule #4. You can never have too many baits.

Excellent rule and so adopted.

I hereby appoint you masterbait.........errrrr.......I mean Baitmaster for life!

Question...does one have to be married to a BAM member?

Panamoka_Bassin reply :

Rule #7: Always use the excuse, "I must have left my cel phone in the truck and I missed your call."

Low_Budget_Hooker reply :

CC- If you are not married, you are probably a "native" Bammer. Born to Be a bammer from the minute you came through the canal.

Aren't you guys enlisted with the local DNR testing and water quality board?

Great organization. They meet 14 times/month, usually on fri nights and saturday mornings. They only require that you take a water sample of the same lake at least 4-6 times a week. It's really not asking much,..I feel it's the least I can do to help protect our environment that big business is quickly killing.

Explain to your partners that you just want to make a difference. You just have the need to feel like you did somthing selfless for the good of all.

I gotta go,...I have to pick up senko77 in an hour. We have a meeting to attend. My work never ends.

Lifetime Bammer-Russ

guest reply :

Question...does one have to be married to a BAM member?

Absolutely not!!! Your interest and outstanding ability to laugh at a good joke are qualities much needed by all bammers. You are hereby granted a lifetime membership, and an appointment to the membership committee. Congratulations!

Rule #7: Always use the excuse, "I must have left my cel phone in the truck and I missed your call."

The rules committee has met and considered your proposal. It has been decided that you do not yet embody the true spirit of BAMism.

BAMMERS DO NOT MAKE EXCUSES.

A more appropriate response would be. "I knew you were going to call so I gave my cell phone to the hooker I visited on my way to the lake"

Your interest is applauded, you are granted "probie" status. A full report from the "Attitude Adjustment" committee will determine the outcome of your application.

Good Luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Low_Budget_Hooker reply :

You see how Avid incorporates the truth with blatant honesty.

I had his cell phone.

Siebert Outdoors reply :

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Rule # 6
This thread is for married or previously married folk. No offense to you single guys living the carefree life of fishing whenever you want. .

I gotta say that is one benifit of being single. When I ask the boss to go fishing I never say no.

Ben reply :

Just tell them like it is. Like I tell my wife when she starts giving me attitude. Try to put a man in the "dog house" and it's very possible he could end up in the "cat house".

Captain Cali reply :

I'm a BAM member and proud!! ;D

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Aren't you guys enlisted with the local DNR testing and water quality board?

Who...me? :-?

grove83 reply :

DNR testing and water quality board!?!? Hmmmmmmm that one I will have to look into! Doing good for all mankind....thats a tuff job. Boy the wife will be proud! The wife knows not to call when I am fishing....wouldn't want to drop my cell phone in the water now would I??

(Note to self....never leave cell phone with hookers....) ;D

guest reply :

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Just tell them like it is. Like I tell my wife when she starts giving me attitude. Try to put a man in the "dog house" and it's very possible he could end up in the "cat house".

It's sentiment like this that brings a tear to my eye :'(

Russ, be careful what you say. People might talk

Bassbum80 reply :

I like the sounds of this. It kind of has the "No MAAM" quality to it like on Married With Children. As a matter of fact...If this thing blows up, I would like to request that we make t-shirts, drink beer & discuss our fishing trips & techniques on a regular basis in person. Maybe at a VFW hall or something. We can get hats with replica bass on it like the elks...Oh man, the opportunities are endless...I love it ;D

Good thinking Avid!

abelfisher reply :

The BAMmer's answer to the wife when she asks, "When will you be back from fishing????"

Answer: " I'll be back, when I get back, IF I come back!!"

dink reply :

Why tell anyone anytihng when you go fishing. I just go. Everyone who knows me, asssumes I am on the lake at all times. She doesn't even attempt to call me until after the sun has set, or later.

Next rule: understand the futility of some non-fishing activities i.e. mowing the lawn or washing the car. Grass will just grow back and winter will eventually take care of it anyway. And everyone knows as soon as you wash your car it will get splashed or bugged or pooped on, etc. Eventually it will rain and wash everything off Mother Nature style. Don't worry about painting the house either.... the dull colors are really making a comeback!

Low_Budget_Hooker reply :

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Russ, be careful what you say. People might talk

Let 'em talk,...real Bammers just don't care, lol.

I will say this......

keep talkin',....I'm goin' fishin'

guest reply :

It makes a feller proud to see y'all gettin on board with this thing.

'No mam' was an inspiration for this movement. Al Bundy would have been a charter member.

I got a pm from an irate female basser. She demanded (in that uniquely female way) that woman be represented. I advised that this is a mens only club, but being the decent sort of guy I am, I decided to create a womens auxilliary.

It's called "WAM" Women Against Men. As a subsidiary of BAM the official name of this group is "WAM - BAM" and thank you mam for putting out, I mean for your input.

grove83 reply :

Maybe we could have a one day get together of BAM/WAM-BAM. Just to say thank you WAM-BAM ma'ams for their input....consider it a one night stand?

P.S. I like to input....um....their input.

roadwarrior reply :

#8 Avoid "hard choices". When in doubt, buy them both.

#9 If you already have everything right, never mix and match: Buy the new reel to go with your new rod and visa-versa.

And here is a tip: She doesn't need (or want) to see your new stuff. Just mix it in with the rest. I promise, if she isn't interested she can't tell the difference.

guest reply :

Quote

Quote
Just tell them like it is. Like I tell my wife when she starts giving me attitude. Try to put a man in the "dog house" and it's very possible he could end up in the "cat house".

It's sentiment like this that brings a tear to my eye :'(

Russ, be careful what you say. People might talk

Hey Russ, Lets not talk about the DOG HOUSE. LOL

Bassbum80 reply :

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It makes a feller proud to see y'all gettin on board with this thing.
'No mam' was an inspiration for this movement. Al Bundy would have been a charter member.

I got a pm from an irate female basser. She demanded (in that uniquely female way) that woman be represented. I advised that this is a mens only club, but being the decent sort of guy I am, I decided to create a womens auxilliary.

It's called "WAM" Women Against Men. As a subsidiary of BAM the official name of this group is "WAM - BAM" and thank you mam for putting out, I mean for your input.

Did she need to send a photo to get that sort of cooperation? ;D

grove83 reply :

I say that we induct Al Bundy to the BAM Hall of Fame!!! Make him an honorary member of BAM and use him as our "roll model". 8-)

Bassbum80 reply :

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I say that we induct Al Bundy to the BAM Hall of Fame!!! Make him an honorary member of BAM and use him as our "roll model". 8-)

Definitely...and then we can trasform the "No Ma'am" acronym from "National Organization of Men Against Amazonian Masterhood" into the "National Organization of Men Against Angler Management"

guest reply :

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8 Avoid "hard choices". When in doubt, buy them both.
#9 If you already have everything right, never mix and match: Buy the new reel to go with your new rod and visa-versa.

Outstanding!!! I had no doubt that RW would make extraordinary contributions. Welcome aboard. You are hereby appointed BAM coach

I think the Al Bundy ideas are great.

Al, you are hereby awarded an honorary doctorate in BAMism and are formally installed as the first BAM hall of fame inductee

Cephkiller reply :

These are great suggestions. I wonder, however, how interesting these posts would be if the old ladies were watching everyone type on the ol' computer?

A true BAM member such as myself would not say one thing different. YEAH!

Gotta go. The wife's coming

Will reply :

I nominate that the BAM official song is Brad Paisley's "I'm Going to Miss Her"

guest reply :

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I nominate that the BAM official song is Brad Paisley's "I'm Going to Miss Her"

Excellent suggestion!! This song captures the essence of BAM and is hereby named as the official anthem of the organization.

Kana reply :

rule 10 quality and quantity, a modifier of RW's dont mix and match rule.

good job, on the anthem.

but dont all organizations have a "icon" i think we need to makethe bait monkey our icon. its is all too often that we find ourselvers in his mercy and must buy tackle and other items, to gain his praise, keep him happy, and await a good fortune on hte water in return for our offerings! besides, avid allowed the baitmonkey to alter his state of mind, you see subconciously he came up with a name that appeases the monkey as well BAM: Bad A** Monkey

guest reply :

Well done, Kana

You are hereby appointed as the international BAM ambassador, and protector of the Bait Monkey.

Your's is a particulary heady responsiblity. The fate of the iconic bait monkey is in your hands.

Guard it well.

Other. reply :

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#8 Avoid "hard choices". When in doubt, buy them both.
#9 If you already have everything right, never mix and match: Buy the new reel to go with your new rod and visa-versa.

And here is a tip: She doesn't need (or want) to see your new stuff. Just mix it in with the rest. I promise, if she isn't interested she can't tell the difference.

I must obey rule number 8

grove83 reply :

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I nominate that the BAM official song is Brad Paisley's "I'm Going to Miss Her"

That has been my signature since I joined this site!!! I must applaude such an effort to name that song the anthiem.

Lets all rise for the playing of the BAM anthiem!!!

bigdog reply :

And we could all subscribe to BIGGENS like al but only are way with fish on the cover ;D ;)

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BAM 2024

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